Poor – narcissistic – mindset

Featured imageLast weekend, I was rereading Anna Karenina by Tolstoy – which is one of my favorite classic novels, I just can’t get enough of it!-, when I found myself rereading one particular line multiple times. This line seemed to summarize exactly what I was thinking about lately: people on social media who brag about their many “good deeds”. I don’t know exactly why, but it makes me furious.

I love the fact that a lot of people try to do something good for others, but please do it for the right reasons! I just feel like a lot of people do this to feel good about themselves. Still happy they do help other people with their narcissism. Nevertheless I cannot help but feel a little irritated when I see a lot of glorifying comments on their “good deeds”-statuses on social media. This feeling got a lot stronger when I heard the following story from my best friend. It does not have do something to do with “good deeds” in particular, but it does underline exactly what I mean.

My best friend went on a trip to Thailand and Vietnam. She was traveling with a group of people when they met a girl who was backpacking on her own. I think they only saw her for a day, but all the girl did was ask everyone to take pictures of her – the entire time!- . At some point, the group – and the girl – arrived at a place where some (poor) kids were playing. The girl asked my friend (or someone else of the group, not sure) to take a picture. When someone agreed the girl went on, grabbed a kid, smiled for the picture, put the kid down without saying a word and left. I don’t know if it’s just me (well, it was not, because my friend was also stunned by this), but I could not believe this. I mean, how does this even come to a person? This is not normal. Those kids are human beings, like you and me. It was not hard for me to imagine her social media status about “how fun it was to play with those kids” and how “she made them smile” (I also see that kind of pictures a lot).

I don’t think this story exactly applies to the Anna Karenina quote I wanted to share (I will never know for sure if she did post the picture with the kids on social media), but it does embody what I mean about the people on social media I was talking about. Also, I felt like I just had to share this story. It is horrible. So, everyone, please:

“It’s much better to do good in a way that no one knows anything about it”

– Leo Tolstoy

On the bright side: Anna Karenina is a wonderful novel and it contains many beautiful quotes. I would recommend it to everyone who has not read it yet. Also, still happy a lot of good is done out of a poor – narcissistic – mindset. 

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Poor – narcissistic – mindset

As if a novel had to be about only one thing.

I rFeatured imageecently read Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie – which I consider to be one of the best novels I have read in while. Also, I would totally recommend this novel to anyone who likes to read about race, immigration, racism and -also, yes!- love. While reading, I stumbled upon a lot of quotes I would like to share. I still have to list them all and I soon will, but I would like to share this one quote in advance. This is so true, yet sometimes so hard to explain. Thanks to Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, I now have a quote ready when someone ‘pops the question’: 

“Why did people ask “What is it about?” As if a novel had to be about only one thing.” 

As if a novel had to be about only one thing.

I considered myself well-nigh a second Columbus

Featured imageA while ago I started reading the classic Reveries of a Solitary Walker by french writer and philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau. In this ‘reverie’ Rousseau describes how he left society to try to find himself in nature. It was one of those works of which I was not sure if I would like it. It turns out, I loved it. It is definitely a book I would recommend, because it is both as funny as it is sad. So, I thought I’d share one of the many great parts of this work. 

This particular part is from the seventh walk (instead of chapters, this work is divided into ‘walks’), in which Rousseau is on a botanical expedition on the hillside of a Swiss mountain, where he finds all kinds of plants. During this expedition he is daydreaming about the place being unknown to the whole universe, he is so sure he makes the following comparison:

“’Doubtless I am the first mortal to set foot in this place.’ I considered myself well-nigh a second Columbus.”

Unfortunately, this state of mind is interrupted by a familiar noise:

“Surprised and intrigued, I got up, pushed through a thicket of undergrowth in the direction of the noise, and in a hollow twenty yards from the very place where I had thought to be the first person to tread, I saw a stocking mill.”

This made me kind of sad, because the ‘Columbus’ part made me laugh: I could really See Rousseau walking happily through the mountains, pretending to be the next Columbus. But the second part clearly showed how hard it might be to escape from (modern) society. Here he finds himself in a perfect state of solitude: to be interfered by a stocking mill.

I considered myself well-nigh a second Columbus